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Men look for big Breasts and Buttocks - whose Fault is it? - 27 Dec 11

27 Dec 2011  Vrindavan, India

Category: Body

Female Figure in Khajuraho

Female Statue at the Khajuraho Temples

Yesterday, when I was writing about breast implants, I already said that most men would not like touching such artificially augmented breasts. Nevertheless many women say that they have this plastic surgery done because of men or for men – to find one, to please them, to look good for them. Men often get accused for only seeing the exterior, for being focused on the body and to see only the figure, nothing else. Today I would like to challenge this blame a bit.

First of all I would like to clarify that what I write does not apply to all men nor does it apply to all women. Among both genders there are examples for those who are focused on the exterior and those who really give more importance to the interior, to the heart, the mind, to values and similar thinking.

This being said, I want to come back to the topic: men are often blamed to see a woman only as a showpiece. She has to look good. Men only look at the size of the breasts and the buttocks. They don’t care about the intellect of a woman, her kindness or her heart. Obviously this is an extreme exaggeration. I believe no normal man would like to live together with a woman who may have a perfect body but who is mean, unkind and angry. But of course there are men who like to first look at a woman’s exterior.

Apart from the fact that women often do the same to men, too, I would like to point out that women also create this image for themselves. It often is their own fault that men would think like this. You ask yourself in which way? By concentrating completely on their own body themselves! Plastic surgery is the extreme example for it. You yourself reduce your whole personality to being your body only.

You actually use your body as a way to attract attention. Artificial enhancements such as surgery but also your clothing and your make-up say a lot about you. You give a message and if you expose a lot of your body, if you have had surgery to make your breasts or also your buttocks look bigger, if you wear make-up in a certain way, you tell a man to look at your exterior! You yourself focus on your body – why would a man do anything else? You are not only your body! Don’t only say this line but behave accordingly!

In the same way you reduce yourself to your body if you hide it too much. I often have this feeling with the religion of Islam when women wear the burqa from head to toe. Hiding or exposing the body in extreme ways simply puts all emphasis on the body. If a woman goes to extremes in any of those two ways I think it is unjust to exclusively blame the man for his thoughts.

Today’s ideal image of beauty is the woman with the measurements 36-24-36, big breasts, small waist and big buttocks and with no hair on her body except on her head and maybe the arms. It is an image that was of course created by men in this society but why do you follow it? Why do you feel it is right and important to look like this? You are a woman, break this image and respect your body as it is. If women did that, we maybe would not see a female body anymore in TV advertisements for men’s razors!

Of course I don’t say to neglect your body or your looks. It is important to keep yourself clean and also nice-looking. You should not however do this for others but for your own good feeling in your body. Dress nicely for your own self-confidence but not to attract attention. It is your presentation, too, that makes men think of your body. Don’t blame them right away but have a look first whether you provoked this attitude yourself.

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Tags:: Body, feminine, Beauty, Attraction

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Posted By Swami Balendu

Swami Balendu

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Comments

We put so much pressure on ourselves to look a certain way and often this is for other people and not for ourselves. Being clean and nice looking is a good thing but preconception of how someone should be or look can be a dangerous thing and may even block the way for friendship and love. In London I have a great friend who is married to a man who is much shorter than her. She is considered to be a very physically attractive woman and he perhaps less so. Often her friends are asking her how come she fell in love with this man who is so much shorter and smaller than her and she tells us that when they were first introduced they were sitting down at a table with many other people. As the evening went by they had many interesting conversations and the other people were coming and going until it was just the two of them left. At this point she felt sure that she had met the man she would spend the rest of her life with. When they stood up she was a little surprised that he was shorter and smaller but it did not change the way she felt. However she admits that had she realized this before they spoke, she may never have acknowledged him at all. They fell in love, have two children and have been together for 20 years.

Reply By Charlotte on December 29, 2011 05:53


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