FEATURED
Previous | Next  

When the Birth of a Child is not a Reason for Joy: the seventh Daughter - 18 Aug 16

18 Aug 2016  Vrindavan, India

Category: Indian culture

Family in 2013

The family in the year 2013 with still five Daughters

Yesterday we got the news that a few of our school girls have got another small sister. Obviously, with 250 children, there are all the time new siblings being born. Normally when you talk about a new life coming to this earth, you feel happy and celebrate. In this case however, we cannot really feel happy with this family – the parents himself are not. The reason is the same but different: it is their seventh daughter!

Oh, we have known this family for so many years and see their development with sorrow: the father is a mason who has already worked on our Ashram building, school building and restaurant building. His eldest daughter was among the first children at our school – and the next three daughters started in the years after that as well. In 2013 I introduced this family to you in my blog. In that time, they had five daughters already and we knew exactly why: they kept on trying to have a son!

The father is hard-working and has managed to save some money to build his home – but obviously it is quite a task feeding six children – and now another belly wants to be filled! We will be here to support the girls with their primary education – but there are other expenses that have to be covered as well!

We actually confronted the father with our concern and were surprised: he started crying and told us that he himself as well as his parents had already told his wife after the second daughter that two children were enough. He complained that everyone suspected him to be the one wanting a boy at all costs – but that in fact it was his wife!

She had even gone as far as to threaten him: if he didn’t make her pregnant again, she would get help by someone else! For her, the reason for not being full of joy about this birth is clear: it is ‘only’ another girl! Another girl to feed, who will have to be married and finally will leave home. No son who will carry on the family name, who will stay at home and earn money for the parents when they are old or whose wife would care for them!

It is unfortunately still like this here in India and this mentality is something which will still take a long time to remove from people’s minds! Girl and boy are not equal here. Parents may love their daughters but daughters and sons are never equal in their eyes. They say it clearly in front of the girls, too: we wanted a son!

I feel for these girls, I feel for these families who increase their poverty only by this wish for a male child. Your daughter is precious and lovely – don’t think she is worth less and don’t make her feel she should be anything else than she is!

Share this post on: 

Tags:: Indian culture, India, Poor, Quality

0 Comments

Posted By Swami Balendu

Swami Balendu

Older Entries

Breakfast

Apra's German Grandparents in Vrindavan - 28 Oct 1...

Apra’s German Grandparents in Vrindavan - 28...

Distributing Workbooks

New Workbooks for our smallest School Children - 2...

It is Saturday, the weekend has started and for ou...

Fear

Caught in a Web of your own Fears? Here is what to...

Sometimes it is strange for me to see how much fea...

Shirodhara

Shirodhara - Ayurvedic Treatment against Stress, D...

A whole lot is going on, as always, and we are bus...

Peaceful Conversation

A Call for open Communication - because it helps! ...

I have always been a believer in open communicatio...

atheist meeting vrindavan

Thanks to religious Leaders, a cancelled Event mad...

So yesterday was my 45th birthday and definitely a...

Ewai Masti

National Convention on Atheism in religious Town V...

Until now, I have not told you yet about a program...

Balendu and Apra

Treasuring every precious Moment with my Baby - 5 ...

Today I woke up in the morning, as usual next to m...

Money

Please read if the Aim of your Life is all about M...

I yesterday wrote about parents who want to suppor...

Work and Money

Please read if the Aim of your Life is working to ...

I yesterday wrote that you should enjoy your work,...

Related Blogs

Flower

Financially independent, beaten every day - but st...

When I yesterday remembered my journey to Australi...

Erotic Sculptures in Khajuraho

Western Culture is not responsible for Sex, Alcoho...

Yesterday I explained that many people blame the i...

Family in 2013

When the Birth of a Child is not a Reason for Joy:...

Yesterday we got the news that a few of our school...

Boys at the Ashram

Being served in India feels strange? Understanding...

Sometimes people who come to India have many quest...

Showering in the Rain

Be Aware of what you Wear - 13 Aug 10

I started talking about Indian and western clothin...

Crowd in India

You have to look at the Dirt in order to clean it ...

While writing so much about my experiences and obs...

Pooja

When we prevented a minor Girl's Marriage - 10 Apr...

After having told you in the past days about the e...

Crowd in India

Indian Men: What you need to change if you don't w...

I have spent the past week describing the dangers ...

Saying Thank you or not in India

Why you don't need to learn the Hindi Word for 'Th...

Whenever people come to India and stay for a while...

Rape

Small Girl, please cover up, otherwise Uncle can't...

Online, I came across a photo which disturbed me. ...

Himalaya

Don't make fast judgments about another Culture &n...

We have made a lot of experiences with guests at t...

Swami Ji and his father

Boys and Girls who Never Move out from Home - 8 No...

As a traveler between countries and cultures, I li...

Apra

Stop teasing Children - it is not funny when they ...

It sometimes seems, especially here in India, as t...

Greeting with Namaskar and negative Energies -11 M...

I have been talking a lot already about religious ...

Swami Ji and Friends

Curiosity towards Westerners expressed in India - ...

When we thought and talked about yesterday’s...

Jeans vs Sari

Jeans for your Daughter but a Sari for your Daught...

I yesterday started writing about the problems tha...

Evolution

Traditionalists stubbornly refuse natural Changes ...

I yesterday explained why I oppose the idea that i...

Couple at the Ocean

Are you ready to accept the Death of your Children...

Today I am planning to write my very last post abo...

Indian Women

Daily sexual Harassment in the average Indian Woma...

While writing mainly about sexual harassment of we...

Western Women

India's bad Image for female non-Indian Travelers ...

Last week we got the news that a female Danish tou...

Have something to say? Post your comment

Comments are moderated and will be allowed if they are about the topic and not abusive.

Get Swami Ji's Diary via Email


Enter your email-address to get news by email!

Feedburner
Blogs
2960
Comments
7380
Topics
83