17 Jun 2009 Erkelenz, Germany
Category: Identity
Some days ago a woman was here for a healing session and we had some talk before we started. She told: “Swami Ji, I have quite a few problems. And the biggest problem is, that I know I have these problems and with most of them I also know what I should do about it but I feel that I cannot do it.”
As an example she told that she knows she is not very spontaneous and sometimes gets stressed easily by small things. “And I know that I have so many things to learn but somehow I cannot do it in that moment!”
I told her “You know, the problem is that you are trying and think you have to learn, but you are actually perfectly fine as you are. Do not give yourself this pressure. If someone has a spontaneous idea and you realize that you are not that spontaneous you get stressed and hectic because you think you would need to be like that, too. But instead you could just relax. Okay, you are not like that. Accept it, that will make it much easier for you.”
Many people also have the problem that they want to keep control and if someone else is spontaneous and has an idea which was not in this person’s plan, he or she nearly panics because it was not planned. In this case I simply advise to let another person take over the plan. Why not? You are not responsible for everything and everybody. Relax, lean back and watch, what others are doing. It is fine, enjoy whatever comes!
Tags:: Identity, Stress, Acceptance, Fight, Pressure, Responsibility, Spontaneous
3 Comments
Posted By Swami Balendu
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Everyone has his own rythm and is free to decide how fast he wants to live his life and how fast he wants to do things. And that's completely ok. But you should never try to convince someone that your way of life is better. There is no better, there is just the difference that makes you unique ;)
Reply By Mirela on August 19, 2012 03:00
This is a lovely example. Sometimes it is overwhelming to think of all the ways we wish we could change. But it's important to just accept who you are! Maybe changes will come with time and maybe not. But we have to learn to love ourselves as we are. Great post Swami Ji!
Reply By Emily on October 17, 2011 06:18
I somehow didn't think it was possible that people with strict order in their life would ever think themselves wrong for not being spontaneous, i thought only spontaneous people felt bad about not being in order! silly me.
Reply By Roger on October 22, 2010 02:09
Today was the last day of the school year 11/12. The children got their report cards, the olde...
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SourceI don’t tell you what you should believe or that you should follow me. I am just a normal person like you and everyone else whose thinking is influenced by his surrounding and the events happening around him.
SourceNobody can predict the future, nobody knows it. The future is written in the stars but you cannot read and translate it. The mystery of what will come next has its own beauty, .
SourceThere is a thin line in between healthy pride and too much ego. Everybody needs some ego and everybody should be proud of himself. Without ego or pride you cannot survive. You cannot exist without ego because you need your ego to identify yourself.
SourceCheating gurus play with the greed of religious people who want to believe in superstition. They lure them in, show them their ‘siddhis’ to make them more and more greedy for success or money and actually suck their money out of them. And in this way they themselves get rich, accumulate tons of gold and just make ridiculous amounts of money.
SourceSpirituality is not a hobby like playing the piano for which you sometimes have time and sometimes not. Spirituality doesn’t cost time. It should be natural. Why do you think you are only spiritual if you practice at least one hour of meditation per day and lots of Yoga exercises? You can be spiritual in eating, cooking and sleeping, too.
SourcePeople prefer making religious donations rather than charity donations to secure a seat in heaven by giving to a preacher or temple.
SourceNot rarely you can see that yoga or meditation gurus mix two common practices and call it their own, put a patent on it and then sell it.
SourceYou can only give love to someone if you love yourself and you can only respect someone if you have respect for yourself. If someone is disrespectful towards you, he or she doesn’t respect him- or herself. They actually do not know the real meaning of respect, not for themselves nor for others.
SourceCorruption in religion is worst because the most corrupt people there show themselves as the purest of ideals that everyone else should follow.
SourceThere are people who are very impressed when you make your talk complicated and others who like that. They like it complicated because it satisfies their ego to understand it.
SourceLife is short, live it! Do what you always wanted to do! Say it! Make it reality! You are the one in charge of your life. Love your life and live it!
SourceA woman just gave birth to a new child on this earth, the biggest miracle of nature itself – and Indian superstition calls her impure! Isn't that like a bad joke?
SourceWhy would God want women to be worth less than men? If men can read a book that you consider holy, why would women not read it, too? Why is it a sign of impurity when they go through their cycle, the most natural process on earth which makes life possible? There is nothing wrong in believing in the good aspects of different religions. Female suppression is however one of those aspects that can happily be left behind. Gender equality and fairness is something that you don’t need a religion to teach you.
SourcePeople believe in superstition because it gives rest and comfort to the mind. It is the human nature that you want to believe only what is favourable and comfortable for you, even if that is not true.
SourceHuman always wants to believe what is suitable and comfortable for them. It is easier to follow the scriptures blindly without looking left or right than trying to deal with difficult issues.
SourceAt some point everybody needs to take his own responsibility and act according to what makes him happy. If you tried to make everyone around you happy, you would never succeed but forget your own fun and joy! You should never make the happiness of others more important than your own happiness, otherwise you will make yourself unhappy – and won’t be able to help others!
SourceYou are not done once you have felt you found yourself. This is you today but who will you be tomorrow?
SourceIt is your own decision how you want to spend your life. You can live a true and honest life. Take your decision and have the courage!
SourceNever skip a reason for a celebration!
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