14 Jan 2010 Vrindavan, India
Category: Relationships
The other day I was writing about arranged marriages. Many times it is like a business: the girl’s father spends so much money to ‘buy’ a good boy for his daughter and they fix the marriage without really knowing each other. It is no wonder that in these marriages there are often many arguments and a lot of disagreement, if they don't end in divorce, which is rather unusual.
On the other hand you can ask yourself if the concept how people in the west want to get to know each other, have regular dates and meet many times really is successful. So what is really the key?
You see here in the East that arranged marriages don’t really work, wife and husband cannot stand each other or she has a problem with his parents with whom they are living. In the west you see how people try to experiment, get hurt often and many times it doesn’t succeed despite all efforts.
In my point of view the main factors are that you are physically close and devotion without any ego. If this devotion is not there, they will be far from each other even if they are physically close, sleeping and living in the same room. Then they cannot understand each other and in these cases relationships sometimes break even after a very long time like 30 or 40 years. No, devotion to each other is very important.
Tags:: Devotion, Money, Relationships, Ego, Arranged marriage, Insult, Partners
1 Comments
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Again this is an issue of balance, as are so many things- especially love and relationships. Sticking two strangers together is no good but there is a higher element of committment and an expectation that thing might be a little hard. Testing and trying on lovers to see how they fit is a good way to find a match but with no idea of how to hold a commitment even good matches can get tossed aside the moment things get hard.
Reply By Jerry on October 29, 2010 02:04
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Trust in yourself and have confidence. You don't need anyone who makes you afraid with stories of a past life or makes promises for the future. Live in presence and have trust in your love.
SourceIf someone cannot accept you how you are, how can they love you? And then, why do you need to worry about what they think? We do not accept others as they are and we do not accept ourselves as we are. And then we struggle.
SourceHuman is just a puppet in a big play. You think you are in charge but there is something bigger than you. Nature, god, the universe, however you want to call it. Even if you know your body, you don’t have full control over it. Nobody knows when, what can happen. Nobody can predict anything.
SourceYou invite others to celebrate because you want to share your happiness. It makes you happy when others celebrate your happiness together with you. If you are happy but alone, you cannot really enjoy it. When you are sad, too, and someone is there with whom you can share it, your sadness is reduced. You need closeness so that you have somebody to share your happiness and sadness.
SourceReligion makes women inauspicious and depicts them as usable objects, as second-grade citizens who belong to men and should obey.
SourceI won’t have a problem with your god if he says to his devotees ‘Please follow your religion and devotion at your home, not on the road.’
SourceThe energy that you have while cooking also goes into the food that you are preparing. Please do not cook when you are angry. Cook when you are in good mood or make your mood good before you start cooking.
SourceReligion has lost its purpose. It has no future, the young generation is refusing it and it is slowly dying.
SourceThere is no moment in life in which a light is switched on, like a bulb, and from then on you are an enlightened being that can give enlightenment to others, switching on their inner light bulbs with just a little trick.
SourceLong-term partners or married couples: feelings are more important than a paper or rituals!
SourceOne of the most dangerous aspects of modern spirituality is that everybody can just invent anything and sell it as the truth, even if it is impossible and unrealistic.
SourceI don’t like the word ‘follower’ or ‘disciple’. Guru simply means teacher, so if you have the need for a teacher, a guru, why don’t you call yourself student? Rather than being a follower who follows blindly like a sheep, you should be a student, eager to learn more, enthusiastic for getting more knowledge and experience.
SourceBreaking with someone causes pain, hurts and makes people feel bad. If there is any way to avoid it, please do.
SourceDon't buy in shops where you see children working. Ask the shop owner, get him to think about it and let him know you don’t buy there because of the child he has employed.
SourceSometimes need to let someone go who does not want to be around you anymore and with whom you cannot share your way anymore. It can happen that these relations get stronger again after some time. Try not to poison a relation. If it doesn’t work, quit quietly. If you can, don’t create bitterness in between you.
SourceArranged marriage means that I have to cope with you – but I cannot bear your family!
SourceA successful relationship comes from devotion, not from ego and expectations. Leave your expectations behind and accept and respect the other one. In order to accept, respect and love in a relationship, you definitely need to accept, respect and love yourself.
SourceInner changes need time, even in a fast food culture.
SourceIf you embarrass your partner in public, it is a sign of disharmony in relationship.
SourceKarma and God cannot work together! If you give God the responsibility for good things, how can you blame Karma for the bad ones? Would God not be responsible for good and bad as well as for all your Karma?
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